There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
she looked like the before picture.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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