Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
