what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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