Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
