He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
