he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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