good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
His nipple licking is glorious
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
