He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You pole danced in your parka.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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