are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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