Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize