So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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