i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize