I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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