Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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