I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize