I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize