Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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