It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
My ass is underappreciated
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
