did you get engaged???
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
