He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
