I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
