Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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