so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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