At least make sure they are 18
Why
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
