tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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