I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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