google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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