but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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