Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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