party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
