That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I smell stomach acid.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
