Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
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