I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Randomize