I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
honey bunches of taint.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
not ubering you a puppy
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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