I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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