yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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