Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
