Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
