Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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