Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
