I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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