and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
