She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize