It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Randomize
