1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize