I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Randomize
