i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
