He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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