ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
