that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize