Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
